Things Never Said By Southerners…

1. Oh I just couldn’t. Hell, she’s only sixteen.
2. I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

3. Duct tape won’t fix that.

4. Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken.

5. We don’t keep firearms in this house.

6. No kids in the back of the pickup, it’s just not safe.

7. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?

8. Spittin is such a nasty habit.

9. I’ve got it all on the C drive.

10. Hey, here’s an episode of “Hee Haw” that we haven’t  seen.

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